Jasmine Hart

Hi. You have so great phrases here. I really like; "you hold me over a plateau, restless" "red as footsoles. drooping, like kept petals" and "the psalms squish me." The ...

Hope you had/have a lovely birthday...I'm not good with the whole time difference thing...all the best for the coming year. Jas

This is beautiful. I love your imagery and your use of form works well with your subject. I love "peachy leaves". I also love; "rippled calm waters." "The fluttering petals ...

Thanks for the reviews. This is rather old!I think I wrote this about three years ago... Saddy, there are some good articles on critiquing if you feel like you need ...

Hi. Welcome to YWS! You have some good lines here. I really like; ""He just kept on hitting me, he wouldn't stop.." I said. They beleived, I was freed." The ...

Hi. Welcome to YWS! This is a beautiful poem, and it flows very well. I love; "A little face, two twinkling eyes, A pair of wings and a beautiful smile." ...

Hi. Welcome to YWS! This flows nicely, and you have some great imagery. My favourite lines are; "Let it burn bright orange" and "Throw the lilacs in the air." I'd ...

Hi Meg, This flows well. It winds down nicely and the last two lines are particularly effective. It flows very well as a whole and doesn't sound forced. The only ...

I got the thirty done. :) Yay for everyone who got something written!

Poem 30: *submitting*

#5 Sensing Beasts I love the rythm and structure. I think that; "(finery of cobwebs hiding core)" is a bit forced. I love; "See the ivory cloak of candles,". and ...

Thanks Kit. Have to go to lecture in five so I haven't read your comments yet! 29. Coffee and Tiramasu *submitting*

Poem 28 Splodge *submitting*

This made my head spin, Kit! Em, is it dreams? I can't really see anything that needs changing (possibly because my mind is boggeling!), except for; "for only", as I ...

I love this. The idea behind it is great. I really love; "There's a story in the Styrofoam." The repetition of "One large, one medium, one small" is very effective. ...